The man woke up in darkness and shouted "Who?"

More from James Hillman's "The Dream and the Underworld":

“Public performance on a stage, perhaps because it puts us into the underworld of theater, also constellates the curious interplay between life-soul and image-soul*. The almost depersonalization of stage fright makes one feel deserted by one’s soul. All that one memorized and trained for has suddenly vanished. It is as if another soul must play the role, and this moment of going on stage is like a rite de passage, a transition into death."

*'This “dual pluralism” of soul refers on the one hand to a life-soul that is multiple, having various associations with body parts and emotions, and so is also called “body-soul”, “breath soul”, and “ego-soul.” On the other hand, there is a free-soul or psyche-soul, which is equivalent with and manifests as a “shadow-soul,” “death-soul,” “image-soul,” and “dream-soul.”'

_______________________

Oh yeah. I can relate. I laughed when I read that "deserted by one's soul..." on stage. Yes, such a feeling it is. But maybe it's into the void created by this terrible desertion (not just by the raw fear, though; preparation would be a big part of this) that another —soul?— can come. When a show goes right, one definitely gets the feeling that it isn't or wasn't you. I've heard and read this so many times that it's a truism. There must be something there.

Another way of putting it: If you're too much your daylight self, then there's no room for anything else. And when your daylight self is up on stage, going through the motions, it's terrible for everyone. It's a weird situation where the audience and the performer all know, pretty much right off the bat, that the show is going to bomb. And yet, some social agreement means that we'll endure it; we won't shrug our shoulders and say, "Aw, this isn't gonna work. Why don't you go home? That's where I'm headed." I remember one show, when, after telling a few jokes that fell silently into the void, I knew that it was going to be a very very long 90 minutes up there. Everyone knew. I felt sorry for all of us.

It stands to reason you better know what you're doing if you're inviting - even unwittingly - someone or something else in to actually "do the show." I think good intentions are the best protection. Besides a good sense of humor.

Aeschylus says

“Death is the only God who loves not gifts and cares not for sacrifices or libation, who has no altars and receives no hymns.” He/She doesn't need anything. Admirable. Has one gift for you: the cure for all diseases.

The shadow of the black dog watches with some kind of interest but no attachment to any outcome.

Excerpts Two

More from Hillman:


“Our culture is singular for its ignorance of death. The great art and celebrations of many other cultures—ancient Egyptian and Etruscan, the Greek of Eleusis, Tibetan [we can add Mayans]—honor the underworld. We have no ancestor cult, although we are pathetically nostalgic. We keep no relics, though collect antiques. We rarely see dead human beings, though watch a hundred imitations each week on the television tube. The animals we eat are put out of sight. We have no myths of the -nekiya- [calling up ghosts or a visit to the underworld], yet our popular heroes in films and music are shady underworld characters."

I have this sense that I can't quite manifest or articulate (so bear with me) that our world is so unbalanced and crazy for this very reason: we push aside the very idea of death. I see our country's willingness to bomb Other People Far Away as a way of (attempting to) "outsource" our own death. We can find Other People to most everything for us that we don't want to do - why not the dying, too? And then we can continue the dream - for that's what it is.

Excerpts

from James Hillman's "The Dream and the Underworld."

“This simultaneity of the underworld with the daily world is imaged by Hades coinciding indistinguishably with Zeus, or identical with Zeus chthonios. The brotherhood of Zeus and Hades says that the upper and lower worlds are the same; only the perspectives differ. There is only one and the same universe, coexistent and synchronous, but one brother’s view sees it from above and through light, the other from below and into its darkness. Hades' realm is contiguous with life; touching it at all points, just below it, its shadow brother giving to life its depth and psyche.”

Fantastic. So exciting to find some of the same ideas coming in from other, unexpected places. Like Greek mythology. I should amend: unexpected to me, since I know nothing of it except some childish memories and some movies. It all seemed silly. This doesn't. This is getting to the core of our existence.

What it doesn't get to is our reluctance - which may be a modern phenomenon, I don't know - to confront this reality, and more importantly, to live with it. To be in both Zeus' and Hades' realm simultaneously. Now that's what I call living.

First Reading

At the WordXWord Festival, right after the great poetry slam at Shawn's Barbershop...

you learn a lot about how it sounds when you read in public for the first time. it's different than practicing, or reading for some friends. you can feel the response to your words in an almost physical way... especially when the energy wanes. those words are falling flat, not justifying their existence. the ideal is that your listener hungers for every next word, and you can feel it when it happens and you can feel it when it doesn't. the latter is highly motivating. cut, cut, practice. do it more, as much as you can. Ok then. What's next?

Books Arrive (30 minutes before the signing). Kind of exciting.

beauty and decay

This is a warehouse for the Paul Richards furniture store in Pittsfield MA. Of course I cranked up the saturation a bit, but it really is red and it really stands out. Housatonic River flows by.

I don't have much more to say. There it is.